Friday, May 30

Music matches.

Last night, while watching Lost (yes, goddammit, i can't fucking tear my eyes away even though it's not even a good show anymore), i was struck by an extreme nostalgia when Jack pulled up to the funeral parlor blasting The Pixies' "Gouge Away" from his Jeep. What a memory!
Standing at the bus stop on Shattuck and Alcatraz, 8:15 in the morning, waiting for the 43, in the rain, underneath my (long-gone) favorite umbrella, the one with the old-fashioned opera posters on it. Long black skirt, black slip flowing out underneath (shut up- i had great fashion sense!), and crumbling black boots that i couldn't throw away. Walkman blasting the Doolittle album, smoking a cigarette and thinking about the first cup of coffee i would drink at work. Climbing aboard the sleepy, steamy bus; avoiding the stares of startled citizens; eyes glued to the floor, snaking my way to the back and trying not to drip water all over everybody's feet. Settling in for the 35-minute ride, smiling and watching the splashing, glistening world go by outside as i popped in Liz Phair's Exile In Guyville.
For this reason, those 2 albums are forever melded together in my mind. Where there is one, there is always the other.

And before all that, before i moved in with Nat, i lived with my best friend Jan near Ashby and Sacramento. I couldn't stand taking the 88 down San Pablo, so i woke up earlier and just walked all the way to work. Took me about 45 minutes, sometimes more if i was dawdling. I would always play the same 3 albums: PJ Harvey's Dry, Bjork's Homogenic, and the Cranes' Loved. Other albums made their way in from time to time: Tones on Tail's Everything, Bauhaus' Mask. But it it those first three i remember the best. They were raw, emotional, beautiful, at a time when i was the loneliest i had ever been. I needed them.
And before even all of that, when i was still a teenager living in Albany, i would walk around at night by myself listening to Depeche Mode's Violator, and Peepshow by Siouxsie Sioux. I would visit my friend Abbey at work and just lose myself in the confusion of the music.

When i first moved here to San Diego, i heard Kings of Leon (Youth and Young Manhood) in a cafe and loved it. That was the same time that "Crazy" by Gnarls Barkley was playing on radios everywhere, so those two sounds are forever associated.

Wow, i can't figure out a way to end this extremely dull post so i'll just say this: remember Drew Barrymore's weird school teacher character in Donnie Darko? Do you remember how she wrote "Cellar Door" on the chalkboard, and said, "This famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language, of all the endless combinations of words in all of history, that 'Cellar Door' is the most beautiful?" Well, i always thought that was hogwash. I mean, "Cellar Door"? Oh really, J. R. R. Tolkien, oh really? (said in the manner of Tina Fey.)
Certainly there are more beautiful words than those. What about "shimmering" or "roses" or "celestial" or "svelte", diaphanous, cacophony, susurration, and melt? Lavender, honeycomb, beehives. Galaxy, stardust, sagebrush, violins. softly whispering, or supple or ravishing... radishes and rhubarb, verdigris, filigree, luminous viscosity, a silvery canopy of leaves, her unwavering gaze. The list is endless i suppose. I guess everyone has his or her own favorite words and/or phrases. Perhaps i shouldn't be such a hater?
The end.

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